Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Jodie Foster is Single

And speaking of newly eligible bachelorettes, the Daily Mail has reported that Jodie Foster and her girlfriend of 14 years, Cydney Bernard, have called it quits.

Man, I am in luck!!! Jodie and I would have the greatest time arm wrestling, going to roller derbies, and every once in a while, she'd let me beat her in a round of golf to make me feel better about myself. Yeah...I'd be a sweet lesbian.

I'd do anything for my Jodie, up to and including killing President Ronald Reagan. Too soon?

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