Thursday, June 19, 2008

Why You Should Hit Your Kids: Reason Number 57


As if I needed more reasons to discipline my kids at a young age to keep them from making terrible decisions growing up. Teach them so they could avoid social situations that are dangerous and not submit to peer-pressure.

Now you are asking yourself:

"Murdoch, what possibly could have happened to make you go on such a rant?"

Well hold on to your fucking asses, this shit is about to spin out of control.

GLOUCESTER MASS. - Teen pregnancies have tripled this year from 4 last year (which is extremely high in my opinion) to 17 in one month! 7 fucking teen!!! That’s crazy, what are people not teaching them safe sex? Is Gloucester full of sluts? Is there a crazy rapist with extremely potent sperm? Do people in Mass fill their water balloons with semen and not water?

NOOOOO, you wanna know what happened. A large group of 15 year old girls made a pact to get pregnant and raise their babies together...A large group of 15 year old girls made a pact to get pregnant and raise their babies together...A large group of 15 year old girls made a pact to get pregnant and raise their babies together...A large group of 15 year old girls made a pact to get pregnant and raise their babies together...

17 of them got knocked up, in one month. They made pact to suffer for the rest of their lives as all dreams of college and a normal life end. They made pact to most likely get 17 guys arrested for statutory rape.

A pact that I make to you, the reader. If you don't hit your kids, you can be the lucky grandmother/father at the age of 45.

3 comments:

* said...

What a funny post...and true!

Mr. Book said...

My bad. They told me they were 18.

Puck said...

wow. what could have... wow. my niece is only three years younger than... wow. i just... wow

murdoch, i admire that you were able to have a complete thought after reading that article. i still can't do it