Monday, June 23, 2008

The WNBA Still Sucks

Ladies and gentlemen prepare to be amazed....

Yes that's correct, you have just witnessed the second dunk ever in WNBA history. Truly, truly amazing footage right there. I don't know who's more excited, me (because I'm currently at a full 3 and 1/2 inches...I mean uhh...that was a joke,my penis is HUGE, like scary huge, it actually played the role of the snake in the movie Anaconda) or the woman announcer who screams "YES SHE'S DONE IT!". Also, (this is directed towards the man at the end of the video) how the hell can you compare that dunk to Air Jordan!? That would be like me going to a little league park and jacking a home run, and then comparing myself to Babe Ruth. I mean we all know the only similarity between me and the Bambino is that we both nailed hot dogs before our games.

This is why women sports blow more than a hooker in Atlantic City. The WNBA was founded in 1996 and the first game was played in 1997. That means in 11 years....there have been two dunks......I'll emphasize that again, 2 dunks. Please, in the NBA there's a dunk every 11 seconds.

I sat down with the commissioner of the WNBA this morning and asked how does your league compensate for the lack of exciting dunks? The response..."with our long range jump shots, and our avid use of bounce passes". So basically intead of watching the WNBA, I could just watch an all white male junior varsity high school basketball game, which by the way is free to go to.

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